Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

  Prologue

  The plane was late.

  Because of the snow.

  It was warm and comfortable inside the airport, but outside, a big snowstorm was falling.

  Pang Qian was wrapped in a big coat, standing in front of the glass, watching as snow piled onto the tarmac. The endless snow, caught in the wind, fell to the ground. Against the dim lights, everything looked a bit fuzzy.

  The airport staff were driving cars back and forth, transporting luggage and clearing off the snow. Pang Qian lifted her wrist to check her watch. It was already 8 PM. Originally, she should have landed in E City by now.

  The gate door was closed, and there were no staff present. Half an hour earlier, someone had come to distribute some meal boxes and mineral water. Pang Qian and a bunch of anxious passengers lined up to get one. After she hurriedly finished eating, she began to wonder about the actual chances of getting home that night.

  She traveled up north for a business trip on her own, in this cold season, to an icy and snow-filled city. Pang Qian was eager to return home. She’d already been here for two weeks. For an easily homesick girl, it really was long enough.

  Still, no one had come to inform them if the plane would be able to take off. Pang Qian sat down in a chair and took a look at the people around her. There was an elderly man who had already fallen asleep in his chair. Next to him was a young mother, coaxing the crying baby in her arms. On the other side, there was a pair of lovers sitting close together, each with one headphone in their ear, watching and laughing at a video on their iPad. A well-dressed middle-aged man sat beside them, still as a monk in meditation…


  A phone rang, and Pang Qian answered. It was her mom, Jin Ai’hua, calling.

  Pang Qian told her that the plan was late, and she wasn’t sure if she’d make it home that night.

  She said, “It’s snowing a lot here. Right now, they haven’t told us anything.”


  Jin Ai’hua said, “Then I’ll tell Xiao Yu to go home. He’s been waiting for your call for a long time. He wanted to pick you up at the airport.”


  Pang Qian furrowed her brows, “Why is he there again? Hurry and tell him to go home. If the plane flies tonight, I can just take the bus home on my own.”


  When she hung up, Pang Qian decided to take a walk around. She’d already been waiting at the airport for several hours, and it was indeed rather boring.

  After visiting a few souvenir and apparel shops, Pang Qian went into a bookstore. The airport bookstore didn’t really excite her. There were a lot of biographies, some books on economic tips, travel guides… Pang Qian looked over book after book without interest, when out of the corner of her eye, she spotted a book that seemed to be a best-seller.

  It was an illustrated book. Normal 16 kai paper, medium thickness, beautifully printed. The cover had a ring of green leaves, drawn with a lot of detail. In the center of the ring was a tiny crab on the back of a small ostrich.

  16 kai is a paper size; I think it’s a pretty standard size for books. The “normal” version is 185mm x 260mm and the “large” ones are 210mm x 285mm, for those interested.

  The crab was red, and the ostrich was brown. You could see the slightest trace of feathers on its body. Its eyes were gentle and clear but dark. The crab was huddled inside its claws, sleeping soundly.

  The title of the book was “My Miss Crab.”


  Pang Qian involuntarily picked up the book. It was wrapped in plastic, and it wasn’t cheap.

  Pang Qian found the author — Mister Ostrich.

  A strange name, but it made her heart beat faster.

  She took the book to the counter to pay, her hand slightly shaking.

  When she returned to the boarding gate, she found that the other passengers had all gathered together. It was an airport staff member who was here to make an announcement. All flights tonight were cancelled because of the heavy snow. As for when they would be resumed, that depended on the weather.

  The staff member apologized and asked us to contact the airline to arrange a refund or to change our tickets. Travelers needing to stay longer could arrange for a hotel downtown. Travelers wishing to take the train could arrange tickets at the train station.

  Pang Qian stood to the side, watching as some unhappy travelers started quarreling with the airport staff. She pulled her coat tighter, feeling at a bit of a loss.

  At 11 PM, Pang Qian finally arranged a hotel to stay at. The hotel was very simple, but they had arranged a single room for her. It had full amenities and the heating was very comfortable. She had no complaints.

  After washing up, she got into bed. Using the orange light from the head of the bed, she finally opened the illustrated book.

  Feeling the smooth cover, Pang Qian looked again at the small ostrich and crab. After she settled down, she opened the book.

  Side Story 2 HANDWRITTEN POSTERS

  Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

  I just remembered something from when we were kids.

  _______________________________________________________________

  The year that Gu Haichuan was in kindergarten coincided with the Olympic Games. The kindergarten teacher handed out a sheet of A3 poster to all the kids. Their assignment was to, under their parents’ guidance, create an Olympics welcoming (or introduction) poster. On the parents’ open house day, they would display all the posters.

  Pang Qian was extremely stressed out as she brought her son home. She couldn’t help complain to Gu Mingxi, “Kindergarten students making welcoming posters? What kind of joke is that?! They can hardly read. Isn’t this basically telling us to write and draw everything?”


  Gu Mingxi smiled. “You can tell him to do it himself. He really likes to draw, so just let him play around or trace something.”


  (Note: GMX uses a pet name for his son– jiu jiu. It’s like the sound of chirping, or I’d always thought of it as the sound of kissing. The author seems to call the kid jiu jiu a lot, but um, well I’ll just refer to him as Baby Gu or Haichuan accordingly.)

  “How can we do that? They’re going to put on an exhibit!” Pang Qian jabbed at Gu Mingxi’s waist with her elbow and giggled. “Our family has a great illustrator. It’s your chance to make yourself known!”


  On the weekend, Gu Mingxi, Pang Qian, and Haichuan sat around the dinner table to discuss what to do with that white sheet of paper.

  Gu Mingxi asked his son, “What do you want to put on it?”


  Haichuan plopped down on the table and thought for a moment. Then he said, “Olympics welcoming.”


  “I know it’s to welcome the Olympic.” Pang Qian sat next to him and asked, “Do you know what the Olympics are?”


  Haichuan furrowed his little eyebrows and hesitatingly nodded his head. “It’s a competition where they run and swim and play sports.”


  “Mm, that’s right. Then, what kind of competition do you like?” Pang Qian continued leading him. “There are a lot of different competitions at the Olympics. We can’t draw all of them, so we’ll draw the three that you like most, okay?”


  “Okay.” Haichuan obediently nodded his head.

  Gu Mingxi asked, “Which competitions do you like?”


  Baby Gu thought for awhile, and then answered, “When the pretty girls do somersaults.”


  Pang Qian asked, “What is it when the pretty girls do somersaults?”


  Baby Gu motioned with his fingers to show her. “Just-just like we saw on TV before! The girl with the big eyes, standing on a piece of wood, doing somersaults! They didn’t even fall off!”


  Gu Mingxi suddenly understood. “Oh, women’s balance beam gymnastics.”


  Pang Qian asked, “What other competitions do you like? You only named one.”


  Baby Gu scratched his head and said, “I like swimming and diving, and also the bouncing trampoline. And also when they play ball on the sand!”


  Seems like they were all competitions where athletes wore skintight costumes, or swimsuits and bikinis…


  Pang Qian reminded him, “Don’t I often bring you to the ping pong gym? Have you forgotten about ping pong?”


  Baby Gu shook his head seriously and answered, “I don’t really like ping pong that much.”


  His childish voice made Gu Mingxi laugh. “Why not?”


  “Because… Because the girls playing ping pong aren’t that pretty,” Baby Gu said. “I like the girl who does somersaults the best! She’s really pretty!”


  Gu Mingxi asked, “Is the somersault girl prettier, or is your mom prettier?”


  “Mm…” Baby Gu’s face turned red and he plopped onto Gu Mingxi’s body. Burying his face, he quietly looked at Pang Qian. “The somersault girl is prettier.”


  Pang Qian smiled. “Gu Haichuan, you can do your poster on your own! Gu Minxgi, you can teach him, but don’t do it for him.”


  After she finished speaking, she turned around and went to the study to work.

  When it came to Baby Gu’s education, Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian didn’t take the eagle dad – tiger mom approach, but they didn’t pamper their son either. They opted for the method where they let things run their course through guidance, accompaniment, encouragement, and occasionally criticism. (Note: eagle dad and tiger mom are basically parents who push their kids to their limit, often in ways modern society views as cruel; see eagle dad for more)

  Pang Qian and Gu Mingxi came to a consensus for teaching their son. Two people, of a single mind. Though they would occasionally come across disagreements or doubts with teaching methods, they would discuss those in private. For example, after Pang Qian said that Gu Mingxi couldn’t help Baby Gu with his poster, Gu Mingxi listened obediently and didn’t help at all.

  Baby Gu’s written vocabulary wasn’t large, so Gu Mingxi found two sports-related songs and let him copy them onto the poster. The rest of the poster would be for drawings.

  But Baby Gu was just a 6 year old child in the end. His handwriting was a mess, like something that was chewed up by a dog. When his characters were large, they were as large as a 5 cent coin, and when they were small, they were as small as melon seeds. After awhile, he finally painstakingly copied down one song. Then he lost his patience and started to pester Gu Mingxi.

  “Daddy, help my draw and write.” He crawled onto Gu Mingxi’s legs and raised his little, pitiful face up. “I don’t want to write anymore.”


  “No, I can’t. This is your homework.” Gu Mingxi comforted him, “After we finish copying the second song, we can draw, okay? I know that you like to draw. We’ll draw the pretty girls who do somersaults.”


  “Daddy, you draw!” Baby Gu was very self-knowledgeable. “I don’t draw well. Daddy, help me draw!”


  “But Mommy said that Daddy can’t help.” Gu Mingxi continued warmly and patiently, “You heard what Mommy said. Daddy will stay here with you and teach you how to write and draw. We’ll work hard together, okay?”


  “No…” Babu Gu grimaced. “Daddy, I want to go out to play.”


  “When you finish drawing, we can go out to play. You’re going to the square later to practice skating too.”


  “I won’t finish the drawing!” Baby Gu looked like he was going to cry. “This paper is so big! So big! Daddy, I don’t want to draw!”


  Gu Mingxi looked up at the clock. He stood up and said, “Daddy has to make lunch. Stay here and finish copying down the song, and then draw. Draw the girls who swim and somersault. I’ll be right back.”


  Baby Gu hugged Gu Mingxi’s leg and wouldn’t let him walk away. “Daddy, help me draw…”


  “Daddy’s going to make Louisiana chicken wings. Do you want to eat it?”


  “…” Baby Gu released his hold and wiped at his eyes. “I want to eat four.”


  “Deal.” Gu Mingxi bent over and knocked his son’s head with his forehead. This was his secret move with Baby Gu, just like how other fathers and sons would high five or hook pinkies.

  When it was lunch time, Baby Gu happily ate four chicken wings. After he finished, he realized that he had to work on his poster again. The little guy couldn’t help himself and started crying. Gu Mingxi really felt conflicted seeing this, so he had Baby Gu go take a nap. The poor little Baby Gu went to sleep on his bed, his eyelashes laced with tears.

  The large poster had already been turned into a mess by Baby Gu. Pang Qian felt that there was no way to save it, but Gu Mingxi said, “It’s okay. Just let him play with it. As long as he doesn’t rip it, it’s fine.”


  Pang Qian picked up the rag-like poster and said helplessly, “If anyone found out that this was made by the son of the author of ‘Xiao Chuan,’ they’d probably laugh themselves silly.”


  “You were a bit harsh with him.” Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian sat together by their son’s bed and watched the sleeping boy. He had a head of fluffy, dark hair and looked very pretty. His facial contours looked more like Pang Qian’s, but his eyes were more like Gu Mingxi’s.

  Gu Mingxi said to Pang Qian, “Adults were obviously supposed to help out with this assignment. The kids wouldn’t be able to do a good job by themselves. He doesn’t know anything about making a poster, so it was inevitable that it turned out like this.”


  “Then what do we do?” Pang Qian asked.

  Gu Mingxi said, “When he wakes up, tell him that you’ll let me help him, and then have him talk to me again.”


  Pang Qian nodded, “Okay.”


  Gu Mingxi looked at her somewhat gloomy face. Suddenly, he chuckled. Pang Qian looked at him strangely, “What are you laughing about?”


  “I just remembered something from when we were kids,” he said. “It was during the Olympics then as well, and we had to do posters. Do you remember?”


  Pang Qian was thought about it and then she laughed. “How could I forget.”


  It was May 1996, and Pang Qian and Gu Mingxi were in the fifth grade.

  That summer, the Olympics were held in Atlanta, USA. The whole nation was passionately welcoming the Olympics, elementary school students included. The art teacher gave an assignment to make a handwritten poster with the theme of welcoming the Olympics. Due on Monday.

  Faced with such an assignment, Pang Qian didn’t need to exert her brain at all. On Saturday afternoon, she flipped through the newspaper they subscribed to at home and found three articles about the Chinese team. Then she pulled out her notebook and found an article she’d previously written called ‘Our Olympics.’ She copied them neatly onto a piece of A3 paper. After spending a bit more than an hour copying it all down, Pang Qian brought the poster, still with lots of empty space, over to Apt 502 to let Gu Mingxi help her draw some pictures and write in the title.

  Gu Mingxi made a face. “You should draw a bit too. If I draw it all, the teacher will easily find out.”


  Pang Qian didn’t think it was a problem. “It’s fine. My drawings are really ugly. Yours look nice. Just help me a bit. I’ll be back later to get it.”


  Gu Mingxi mumbled to himself, “I haven’t even started on my own poster yet.”


  “Aiyo, just help me out. I’ll treat you to a doll popsicle later.”


  He raised his head to look at her. “I want cola.”


  “Deal!” Pang Qian stood up. “I have to go home to watch TV. Tonight is the finale episode of ‘Instinct.’ Have you watched any of it?” (Note: Instinct is a 1994 Hong Kong drama)

  Gu Mingxi shook his head. “My dad doesn’t let me watch TV.”


  “Ekin Cheng’s Pau Man-lung is so handsome! And Poon Long-ching’s such a baddie!” Pang Qian ran through the story of the drama and then got up, pat off her bottom and said, “Hurry up and draw. I’m going back to watch TV.”


  After Pang Qian left, Gu Mingxi started to look over the A3 paper she left behind. She was really lazy. She’d only written a little bit, and left all this space for him to fill in. Gu Mingxi sat at his desk and grabbed an illustrated book with his right foot. There were a lot of animals and plants inside that he could copy. Gu Mingxi flipped through the book with his toes and picked a few images to leave for Pang Qian to draw.

  He earnestly helped her to fill in the title for the board. In all the blank spaces, he carefully made a pencil sketch for what he’d fill it in with. After two hours of preliminary work, he picked up the poster with his toes and looked at it with satisfaction. He got ready to add the colors.

  He didn’t use watercolors because the effect wouldn’t be good. Gu Mingxi found some paints, a palette, and a brush. As he hummed, he filled in Pang Qian’s poster with color.

  When he painted, he was always in a good mood. Moreover, this was for Pang Qian. Gu Mingxi sat in his chair, his two feet busying themselves on the desk. The poster slowly turned colorful. The drawings and Pang Qian’s articles were interlaced seamlessly.

  But when the poster was nearly completed, a small accident occurred.

  Gu Mingxi was picking up some paint on his brush with his right foot when he accidentally knocked into the cup of rinsing water next to his palette. He watched the cup tremble and anxiously raised his right foot to steady it, but in the end, he knocked the cup of water over.

  The cup of muddy water crashed onto the table. Gu Mingxi’s first reaction was to save Pang Qian’s poster, but it was already too late. Most of the poster was already soaked, and slowly, his paintings and Pang Qian’s writing were washed in the muddy water. The paper was a mess, and Gu Mingxi’s mind went blank.

  Li Han walked into his room after she heard the noise. She only saw that his desk was a mess as she helped him stand up and tidy his desk.

  The water was running down his desk onto the floor. Gu Mingxi stared at the poster, completely dejected.

  “What are you staring at? Hurry and go wash your feet,” Li Han told him. “Look at your feet. Ah, what’s this?”


  She picked up the soaked paper as Gu Mingxi called out, “Don’t throw it away!”


  But he was too late. Li Han had already balled up the paper and thrown it into the trash.

  Gu Mingxi looked at her, his head hanging in despair. “Mom, that was Pang Qian’s homework.”


  Pang Qian was in tears from watching the finale of ‘Instinct.’ After dinner, she went over to Gu Mingxi’s house to pick up her poster. She didn’t forget to head downstairs to buy him a cola first.

  With red eyes, she carried the cola to his room. Gu Mingxi looked at her a bit restlessly and asked, “Why did you cry?”


  “Lam Ching-lit died. She burned to death. (crying sounds)” Pang Qian explained the story of the finale as she continued to cry sadly. “I hate them. If I knew she was going to die, I wouldn’t have watched it. (crying sounds) Oh, your cola.”


  She put the cola down on Gu Mingxi’s desk and sniffled. “Do you want me to help you open it?”


  Gu Mingxi shook his head. How could he still dare to drink her cola. Quietly, he said, “You drink it. I don’t want it.”


  “What’s wrong? You’re the one who said you wanted to drink it.” Pang Qian finally stopped her crying. She looked at his desk and then around his room. “Where’s my poster?”


  Gu Mingxi, “…”


  She continued asking, “Did you finish drawing it?”


  “…”


  “Gu Mingxi, can you hear what I’m saying?”


  Gu Mingxi gathered up his courage and raised his head to look at her. He extended his right foot and pointed to the trash can next to his desk. “Pang Pang, I’m sorry. I got your poster dirty, I…”


  Pang Qian rushed over and pulled out her broken poster from the trash. She looked at the text that she’d copied down. It was already illegible. Suddenly, she got mad. “Gu Mingxi, what did you do?!”


  “It wasn’t on purpose.” Gu Mingxi stood next to her, rushing to explain. “My foot accidentally hit the cup of water I used to wash the brush. The cup fell and the water spilled. I…”


  “I don’t care! It took me so long to copy it!” Pang Qian stared at him with red eyes. “I hate you! I’m going to ignore you from now on!”


  As she said this, she tossed the ragged poster back into the trash. Then she turned away and ran out. Not two seconds later, she returned to snatch the cola from his desk. With a “hmph!” she ran off.

  Pang Qian sat angrily in her room for half an hour.

  In that time, she finished the bottle of cola. Then she recalled that poster. Aside from her text, it was mostly colorful drawings. And then her anger disappeared.

  She sat on her bed and hugged her knees, thinking that she’d write out the article again tomorrow morning and have Gu Mingxi draw again.

  “If you make the drawing so complicated, the teacher will know right away that I didn’t draw it. What an idiot.” Pang Qian picked up a comic book and started reading. She spoke out loud, “Alright, I forgive you. I’ll treat you to another cola tomorrow.”


  On Sunday morning, Pang Qian slept until 8 o’clock. When she recalled that she still had to work on her poster, she got out of bed, whining. As she was washing her face and brushing her teeth, Jin Aihua told her, “There’s something of yours on the table. Gu Mingxi’s mom brought it over earlier.”


  Pang Qian thought it was odd. After she washed up, she headed to the living room and saw a roll of paper on the table.

  She pulled off the rubber band and unrolled the paper. She was entirely dumbfounded.

  It was a completed poster, filled up and colorful. On the top, there were the signature five Olympic rings, and on the side of it, there were white clouds and birds. The articles were scattered around, and each one had interesting illustrations accompanying them. Pang Qian looked carefully at the paragraphs of writing. That idiot even tried to copy her handwriting. His writing was originally very pretty, but he intentionally wrote carefully, but childishly. Pang Qian looked at the spot where the title and her name went: Thirst for Knowledge Elementary, Class 3, Pang Qian.

  Pang Qian went over and knocked on the door to Apt 502. Li Han opened the door and told her quietly, “Gu Mingxi’s still sleeping.”


  Pang Qian asked, “Auntie, do you know how late he was up until last night?”


  “Probably around 4 in the morning. The sky was already lighting up,” Li Han said. “Did you get the poster? Mingxi said he messed up yours so he should pay you back.”


  “I got it…” Pang Qian bit her lip. “Auntie, can I go in to see him?”


  Li Han nodded. “He just fell asleep not long ago, so don’t be too loud.”


  “Mm.”


  Pang Qian walked to Gu Mingxi’s room. The curtains were drawn and he was fast asleep.

  She looked at his desk and saw a pile of brushes, paints, and scratch paper. Clearly, he hadn’t cleaned up after he finished.

  Pang Qian sat down by Gu Mingxi’s bed. He was covered with a thin blanket, his eyes closed, giving off a light snoring sound. Gu Mingxi was only wearing a white tank top, and his exposed shoulders and scars made Pang Qian’s heart ache.

  She watched his sleeping face and curled her lips. Reaching out to ruffle his hair gently, she said quietly, “Why are you so stupid. It’s not even due today. Why did you stay up so late.”


  When Gu Mingxi woke up, it was already noon. He hadn’t slept enough, but when he thought of his own poster that he’d yet to start, he could only bite the bullet and push off his blankets to get out of bed.

  As he sat up, he saw a bottle of cola by his pillow and a note beneath it.

  Gu Mingxi reached over with his leg and grabbed the paper. Pang Qian drew a grimace and wrote: Idiot, thank you. But in the future, don’t stay up all night, otherwise I’ll get angry!

  Looking at her threatening words, Gu Mingxi couldn’t help laughing.

  But then, in the next instant, he looked down at his bare shoulders, startled.

  She’d once said that his scars were very scary. He wondered if she saw them this time.

  Gu Mingxi didn’t want to frighten her.

  When Baby Gu woke up, Pang Qian gave him some good news. He could ask Daddy and Mommy to help him with his poster so he didn’t have to do it alone anymore.

  Baby Gu got up right away and ran to his dad’s studio. He wanted Dad to help him draw the pretty girls who did somersaults. Gu Mingxi said, “Daddy can help you write. Let Mommy help you draw, okay?”


  “No!” Baby Gu had already developed a sense of aesthetics. “Mommy’s drawings are ugly!”


  Gu Mingxi laughed out loud, and then he and Baby Gu walked over to the living room. The whole family sat together with the messy A3 posted in front of them. Gu Mingxi exhausted his abilities to save that poster, and finally had a delightful and completed poster.

  After dinner, Gu Mingxi, Pang Qian, and Baby Gu went to the New Century Plaza to roller skate.

  There were some tens of little kids practicing with the instructor. Pang Qian helped Baby Gu put on his protective gear and then he rushed off to join the instructor.

  Four kids stood side by side and the instructor asked, “What’s four plus three?”


  The kids looked at him blankly, and then instructor said, “We’ll start with the first one to answer correctly.”


  The kids scrambled to raise their hands, and the instructor pointed to one of the girls. “You can answer.”


  “Five!”


  “Wrong.”


  One of the boys shouted, “Ten!”


  “Wrong!”


  Baby Gu rushed to raise his hand and the instructor called on him.

  Pang Qian and Gu Mingxi looked at him expectantly.

  With full confidence, Baby Gu answered, “Two!”


  All the parents at the side chuckled and the instructor completely abandoned the question.

  He walked behind Baby Gu and had him squat down with his hands behind his back. Then the instructor pushed him forward.

  “Slower, slower. Slowly open your legs. Open. Okay, pull back. Good.”


  Baby Gu skated for a very long stretch under the instructor’s guidance. On his way back, the instructor said, “Do you see your mom and dad? Can you skate over to them on your own?”


  Baby Gu lifted his head and saw Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian some tens of meters away. He nodded. “I can do it.”


  “Okay, go on over!”


  The instructor gave him a push, and the little boy with a blue helmet started sliding forward.

  He rolled along with a stagger, but he wasn’t scared at all. He looked at his parents with shining eyes, and Pang Qian cheered out for him. Gu Mingxi was already crouched down on the ground.

  He was a special kind of dad, unable to open his arms to pull his child in for a hug like other parents. But just like everyone else, he could use his warm chest to accept his baby.

  Gu Haichuan smiled happily. He finally slid over to Gu Mingxi, and he spread out his little arms and landed onto Gu Mingxi’s body. He wrapped his hands around his dad’s neck and gave him a kiss on the cheek.

  “Daddy, I can skate!” He giggled.

  Gu Mingxi kissed him on the cheek as well. “You’re so awesome.”


  At this moment, a girl wearing a red helmet slid over to them.

  Baby Gu turned to her. When Gu Mingxi noticed, he asked, “Who’s this?”


  “She’s Guodong,” Baby Gu whispered into Gu Mingxi’s ear. “Daddy, isn’t Guodong really pretty?” (Note: Don’t know if it’s a nickname, but ‘guodong’ means jelly)

  “…” Gu Mingxi asked, “Didn’t you like Xiao Hudie?” (Note: ‘xiao hudie’ is little butterfly)

  Baby Gu responded seriously, “Now I think that Guodong is prettier than Xiao Hudie.”


  Gu Mingxi: = =

  “Guodong and I will go to the same elementary school,” Baby Gu said happily, his smile reaching his eyes.

  Gu Mingxi asked, “Are you happy that you two will be going to the same school?”


  “Yes!”


  “Are you two good friends?”


  “…” Baby Gu blinked his eyes and his head drooped. “I don’t think she knows who I am.”


  Gu Mingxi laughed. “Then, go over and play with her. Look, Guodong skates very well.”


  Baby Gu turned to look and nodded. “Mm, I want to play with her!”


  He left Gu Mingxi and stumbled over. Guodong was already very good at skating, so Baby Gu had to use a lot of effort to catch up to her. Gu Mingxi stood up and looked at Baby Gu, grinning as he talked to Guodong. Then the two kids held hands and skated together.

  Pang Qian had been listening to their conversation and she couldn’t help shake her head now. “I realized that our son’s rather fickle, completely unlike you. He sees a new one and likes a new one. His head’s just full of pretty girls. What do we do about it?!”


  Gu Mingxi smiled, “Don’t worry. He’ll have his own life later.”


  Right beside him, Pang Qian wrapped her arm around his waist and pulled him closer.

  Gu Mingxi whispered to her ear, “One day, he’ll grow up and leave us to have his own life.”


  She said, “Mm, just like you and me.”


  Yes, just like every one of us.

  Side Story 1 HOW MUCH I ENVY YOU (2/4)

  Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

  Don’t cut it. You look good with long hair.

  _______________________________________________________________

  When I was younger, I lived in South Africa. My dad often went away for business trips across the African continent. My mother and I stayed in Cape Town awaiting his safe return each time.

  South Africa was one of the more developed countries in Africa. There was more diversity, and education there was better than much of the continent. I would go to school with all the other little kids, and then I’d study Chinese at home with my mom.

  When my dad returned, he would tell me about all the things he’d heard and seen when he was away. Interesting things, thrilling things, difficult situations, magical things… Listening to the stories, I felt almost intoxicated. He showed me the pictures he took. Sometimes he would stay in the field with his team for a very long time, just to observe the habits of zebra or antelope. He told me about how a lion hunted a zebra. He told me that this was a world where the strong preyed on the weak, and if you didn’t want to get eaten, you’d have to make yourself stronger.

  I was completely amazed with the fantastical world. During summer vacation, Dad would take me and Mom along with him to work. The first time that I sat in the off-road SUV and saw the vast African savannah filled with droves of animals, I was shocked. For the first time in my life, I felt the insignificance of humankind.

  Once, when I followed my dad’s team out to the field, we came across an area covered with animal carcases, left after a large fight. From the remains, one of the scientists supposed that it was a fight between some lions and a group of hyenas.

  On the battlefield, my dad and his team found a dying baby lion in the heap of hyena corpses. It was heavily injured, left behind by its pack. It had likely survived a few days by eating the rotting flesh remains.

  Dad brought the little lion back to our camp. It wasn’t really that small, but Dad said that it was still young. Its body was covered in scars. In order to protect its life, the accompanying veterinarian amputated a limb.

  The little lion’s entire right-side front leg was amputated. Its right-side hind leg was also missing a chunk. When I saw at it, it was wrapped up in gauze, asleep from the anesthesia. I asked my dad when it would get better, when it could return home.

  My dad told me that it would never be able to go home.

  A major predator on the food chain, still young and missing a leg. If it was released back to the wild, the only end for it was death.

  At the time, the film ‘The Lion King’ was sweeping the globe. My dad told me that his team stole the name and called their little lion Simba.

  Simba followed us back to South Africa and was handed over to a zoo in Cape Town. Afterwards, Derrick and I often went to visit it. All by itself in a cage, it looked very lonely.

  Watching Simba limping around with difficulty, its front leg missing, I grabbed onto the railing and felt a strange sense of loss.

  Derrick was the boy who lived next door to us. He was white and a year older than me. He had blond hair and a pair of deep blue eyes. We were good friends. Derrick told me that, on our street, I was the most particular kid.

  It was true that I was the only Chinese girl in our neighborhood, with straight, black hair and a pair of dark eyes. Derrick said that I looked like a fairy, and I was the prettiest girl he’d ever seen.

  My concept of aesthetics was likely formed around that time. With regards to people’s appearances, I’d never had any particular preferences. When I returned to China, I’d often heard the neighbor girls say that black people looked disgusting. I found that outrageous. In my memories, the black kid next door when I lived in Cape Town, Arno, was brave and cute. Often times, I preferred to play with Arno instead of Derrick.

  I started learning violin at a young age, along with Derrick. I wasn’t very good, but Derrick often received the teacher’s praise. Mom had asked me before, ‘Xiao Jing, do you dislike playing violin? If you don’t like it, you don’t have to keep taking lessons.’


  I told her, “I don’t dislike it.”


  My mom was a bit suspicious. “Then why don’t you practice more?”


  I thought it was strange. “Who said that I don’t practice?”


  I clearly practiced very diligently. It’s just that I wasn’t as good as Derrick, but that didn’t say anything about my enthusiasm for playing the violin. I practiced every day. Derrick would knock on my window and rest on the window sill, saying, “Jodie, your violin playing sounds bad.”


  I would quietly push his hands away and lock the window before continuing to play the violin.

  Only Arno said that my violin playing was nice. He was from Nigeria, with dark skin and big, bright eyes like two big grapes. Because of his dad’s work, they had just moved to South Africa a few years before. He said that when he listened to me play violin, it reminded him of home, back in Nigeria.

  When I was 12 years old, an epidemic started spreading through several countries in Africa. For my and my mother’s safety, my dad accepted a work transfer and prepared to take us back to China.

  I told Derrick that I was going back to China. After being startled for a moment, he finally said, “Jodie, I love you. I will miss you.”


  I told Arno that I was going back to China, and he blinked a few times before silently heading home.

  That evening, Arno came over and knocked on my window. He handed me something.

  It was an African drum.

  It had a strange body with some complex carvings on it.

  Arno told me that the drum was handcrafted by his grandfather when he was younger. Even the skin used for the drumhead were from the animals that his grandfather personally hunted.

  “Jodie, I’m giving this drum to you.” When Arno opened his lips in the dark of the night, his shining white teeth and eyes were very conspicuous. He said, “My grandpa told me that this is a magical drum. He gave the drum to my grandma and they got married later. My dad gave my mom this drum, and then they also got married. My grandpa told me that if I give this to the girl that I love, we’ll be together in the end.”


  I felt that I couldn’t accept such a precious gift. Arno looked a bit crestfallen. He asked, “Jodie, do you not like me?”


  No, I liked him.

  I accepted the drum and held it tightly. Arno smiled and said, “I’ll come teach you how to play it tomorrow, okay?”


  “Okay,” I said.

  Later on, I followed my parents back to China. The first summer vacation, I started to practice the drum at home, but the neighbors ended up complaining.

  My mom said that this wasn’t Cape Town and implored of me to stop playing the drum. Then I begged my dad to let me call Arno’s house. I wanted to play the drum for him. But then came the despairing news.

  Arno had been infected with a virus. A month ago, after treatment failed, he passed away.

  That was the most heart-aching summer day of my life.

  The day that Year 1 (of high school) finished, I gave the drum that Arno gave me to Gu Mingxi. I knew that a few minutes later, he would give that drum to Pang Qian.

  If this drum from Africa was really as magical as Arno said, then, one day, a pair of lovers would finally end up together because of it.

  After Year 2 started, Pang Qian was no longer in our class because of the class restructuring. Teacher Dai asked Gu Mingxi and me about our opinions, and then we became deskmates.

  Gu Mingxi didn’t speak much. After the ‘Outstanding Student’ incident, he became much more quiet and solemn. And perhaps it had to do with the fact that Pang Qian was no longer by his side.

  Zhou Nanzhong and Wang Song would help Gu Mingxi with some of his daily needs, but otherwise, he would use his own two feet to slowly take care of his own matters. He rarely asked me to help him. And I didn’t offer my help either. At lunch, he would still eat together with Pang Qian. When we lined up in the cafeteria, I often saw the two of them together, standing at the window. Pang Qian carried two lunch boxes and pointed at the food behind the glass, asking Gu Mingxi what he wanted to eat.

  Only when he was with Pang Qian would Gu Mingxi’s expression relax and be at ease. He would smile and discuss with Pang Qian about which dishes were better.

  The image of them eating together was still clear in my mind. They sat across from each other, a lunch box for each of them. Pang Qian would steal Gu Mingxi’s food, and Gu Mingxi would help her eat the things she didn’t like.

  One person used their hands, the other used their feet. They picked at each others’ lunches with their spoons. That kind of intimacy and understanding was like an invisible wall, keeping everyone else out.

  So I didn’t interact much with Gu Mingxi.

  Perhaps to other people, I was a very strange person. I didn’t really have any friends in the class. I didn’t understand what the girls in class would chat about. The comics and celebrities that they liked, fashionable clothing, I didn’t know about any of it.

  I always kept my hair short and wore a pair of large glasses. My clothes were very ordinary, a t-shirt and jeans. I knew that I wasn’t a girl who would catch anyone’s eye, but I didn’t care about that at all. After I returned to China, everyone said I was very refined. At first, I didn’t know what that word meant. After I understood it, I was a bit surprised, and also relieved.

  What right did I have to say that Gu Mingxi didn’t speak much? I was clearly the mystery to everyone.

  I was short, even shorter than Pang Qian. That’s why I always sat in the front row in class. When I became deskmates with Gu Mingxi was the first time that I sat in the back of the room.

  I sat at Pang Qian’s old spot, and I found out that it was really an interesting seat. In the back corner of the classroom, with a window beside me, I could clearly see the schoolyard below.

  Zhou Nanzhong and Wang Song who sat in front of us were both very tall. Sometimes, I suspected that if I played around behind them, the teacher wouldn’t even be able to see me.

  After being deskmates with Gu Mingxi for two weeks, I realized that he wasn’t stuffy at all. Sometimes he would do some interesting things, just like other kids.

  For example, when he was tired of working on practice problems, he would start to draw a bit. Just like other boys his age, he liked to draw big-breasted, small-waisted, long-legged girls and strong, muscular guys. Other times, it would be robots and monsters. He would start sketching on the paper, hunched over, head down, his body leaning slightly to the right. He used his left foot to block the drawing, seemingly not wanting for me to see.

  So of course I pretended not to see. Still, I couldn’t help myself from looking. After he drew for awhile, Gu Mingxi would return to doing his practice problems. He folded up the paper he drew on and stuffed it into his desk.

  More than once I saw him sketching out a girl. The girl would sometimes be standing, sometimes sitting, sometimes jumping, or looking back. Her hair was tied up in a ponytail, and her face always carried a bright smile.

  I rested my chin in my hands and secretly watched him draw. I really wanted to remind him that Pang Qian’s chest wasn’t that big, that her waist wasn’t so small, and she didn’t have long legs like that.

  But of course, I didn’t say anything.

  For the Autumn sports festival in Year 2, I ran the 800m. Pang Qian participated in her class’ 4x100m relay. From the stands, I watched as she slipped away and joined our class. She sat down next to Gu Mingxi and started chatting with him.

  “It’s so hot.” She separated her hair and braided it. She turned and saw me. Then she said to Gu Mingxi, “Ah, do you think I should cut my hair? Like Xiao Yujing’s. It’ll be easier to wash and better to stay cool.”


  Gu Mingxi stared for a moment. Then he shook his head and said quietly, “Don’t cut it. You look good with long hair.”


  After Christmas, I saw that angry man again in the rehab hall.

  He didn’t shout anymore, but was diligently practicing to walk. The t-shirt on his body was covered in sweat. After training a bit, he would quietly say a few words to his physical therapist. With furrowed brows, he pointed to his left leg prosthetic, as if saying there were something wrong with it.

  I saw him several times after that, but we never spoke. When he saw me, his expression turned a bit unnatural. I didn’t take it to heart though, and each time, I smiled at him.

  As the Spring Festival of 2011 approached, I decided to go home for New Year’s.

  Before I left, I had a bit of a headache about where I would leave Ah Miao.

  I didn’t want to bother my friends or colleagues, so I ended up deciding to leave it with a pet store.

  I found a pet store near the school and carried Ah Miao over in its carrier. And then I met the angry man there.

  He was a bit surprised to see me. At this point, we couldn’t help but introduce ourselves.

  “My last name is Xiao, little moon Xiao.” I started speaking in Chinese, but then I became a bit uncertain since some ABCs (American-born Chinese) could speak Chinese but didn’t know to read it. Then I added in English, “You can call me Jodie.” (Note: ‘little’ and ‘moon’ are the characters used to write her last name)

  “I know, little moon Xiao.” With a serious look, he extended his right hand to me. In Chinese, he said, “Lin Weiqi, English name Virgil.”


  I politely shook hands with him. His hands were very big, warm, strong. After we pulled back our hands, his expression warmed slightly. He said, “I have to apologize about last time, Jodie. I was really very irritable that day and I scared those kids. I’m sorry. I promise it won’t happen again.”


  I smiled and lifted up my carrier to show him Ah Miao. “I’d like to check in this cat. If you give me a discount, I’ll forgive you.”


  He couldn’t help laughing. His firm face suddenly broke into a smile, and his eyes filled with a gentle light. I suddenly felt my mood improve.

  Epilogue

  Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

  It was the fourth year of his studies and Gu Mingxi was getting ready to head back into the work field.

  His professional foundation was very solid, and since he was a lot older than his classmates, his artwork generally left a deeper impression. A few of the younger professors had even become pretty good friends with him. They often had lunch together and went to art exhibits together.

  Gu Mingxi was working on a fine arts degree in painting. After graduation, people would probably work in an art studio or for the design department in a company. Some even accepted teaching jobs at primary schools and even high schools.

  He was already 31 years old. While he’d continued making books, Gu Mingxi had never let go of his intent to return to teaching.

  Currently, Gu Mingxi had already completed the fourth book of his ‘Xiao Chuan’ series. He was busy with school, and because he also had to spend time with his wife and son, he could only guarantee one book release a year. Still, his ‘Xiao Chuan’ series was selling very well. The series followed the young boy, Gu Xiaochuan, as he grew up, and the character was already a 13 year old boy. A lot of animation companies had already locked their eyes on the story. After Gu Mingxi discussed with Pang Qian and Jiang Qi, they picked out a strong company to sell the rights for an animated adaptation for the first three books in the ‘Xiao Chuan’ series.

  During the past few years, he’d made quite a bit of money from selling the rights to his works. ‘Mister Ostrich’ had become very popular in the book, film, and animation markets. The only thing was that he never revealed his identity and appearance to the public. Though many people knew about his situation, everyone was in agreement to keep that knowledge secret. To this day, Mister Ostrich was still a very mysterious person that fans scrambled to find out more about.

  Gu Mingxi left all the money he earned in the care and management of Pang Qian. As an industry insider, Pang Qian completed this task beautifully. One day, she opened up their online account and looked at the startling number on the screen. Then she ran over to Gu Mingxi and hugged him, swaying back and forth.

  “What’s going on?! Pang Pang?” Gu Mingxi asked in surprise.

  Pang Qian closed her eyes and giggled foolishly. “I wanted to see what it felt like holding onto a money tree.” (Note: The phrase she uses refers to a legendary tree that drops coins when you shake it)

  Gu Mingxi laughed and asked her, “Do you know what it feels like now?”


  “It’s more wonderful than words can express!”


  Because she’d given birth, Pang Qian took a gap year in her second year of studies. She was currently faced with interning in her third year of studies. Of course, for someone who’d already had work experience like herself, she wasn’t overly concerned with internships or future job prospects. She’d already chosen the company she would work for after graduating.

  Over the past few years, Pang Qian had continued to stay in contact with Zou Liwen. She would be graduating soon, so she invited him out for a meal and expressed her interest in a job. Zou Liwen was still working in E City at Jialai Investments. While the company indeed had a vacancy, he felt that the salary wasn’t fitting of Pang Qian’s experience and academic background.

  He hadn’t expected for Pang Qian to so gladly accept the offer. She said, “My son is still young, and my husband works too much. The important thing for me is to be able to spend more time with them for a few years. It’s better not to be too busy when I first return to the workplace. Team Leader, let me get myself readjusted first. After two years, when my son starts school, I’ll think about my plans again.”


  Zou Liwen nodded his head. Then he said, “Actually, in the past two years, I’ve had some other thoughts.”


  Pang Qian’s eyes shined. Hesitatingly, she asked, “Team Leader, are you… planning on starting your own business?”


  She’d already been working with him for nearly ten years. Although they were polar opposites, they’d developed a working rapport through the years. Zou Liwen looked at Pang Qian and asked, “If I were, would you come along and help?”


  “Of course!” Pang Qian seemed to be more excited than him. “Team Leader, you should’ve done this a long time ago!”


  Zou Liwen said, “But, if you follow me, I probably won’t be able to match the salary that Jialai’s currently offering.”


  Pang Qian shook her head. “That’s okay. I’m not the breadwinner in our family anyway. What’s important when it comes to work is that you enjoy it. You should face challenges and grow, and most importantly, you should have a good team leader.”


  Zou Liwen stared at Pang Qian for a long time, then he narrowed his eyes. “Pang Qian.”


  “Mm?”


  “Have you ever considered not being my subordinate?”


  Those words were really quite ambiguous. Pang Qian’s head grew muddled. “T-t-t-team Leader, what do you mean by that? If I’m not your subordinate, what would I…”


  “Business partners.” Zou Liwen gave her a very clear-cut response as he crossed his legs and took a sip of his coffee. “Be my partner and venture into this together with me. Pang Qian, I hope you’ll seriously consider it.”


  Pang Qian went home and told this story to Gu Mingxi, asking for his opinions. She originally thought that he would be against it because starting their own business would require a lot of work. Instead, Gu Mingxi actually showed his approval of the idea.

  “When you’re still young, you can push yourself a bit,” he said. “Moreover, you’ve been working together with him for a long time. You must know pretty clearly about his abilities and his contacts. Although I haven’t talked to him much, I can tell that he’s not an impulsive person. Without having made serious considerations, he wouldn’t have put forth such a suggestion.”


  He leaned to Pang Qian and said quietly, “Most importantly, I think that you also want to give it a try.”


  He really understood her. Pang Qian raised her eyes to look at him. “Aren’t you worried I’m going to lose all your hard-earned money?”


  “Oh… I’ll allow you to take half of it. It’s fine if you use it all up.” Gu Mingxi laughed. “Starting a business definitely has its share of risks. The economy changes so quickly. Even Zou Liwen can’t predict it with a 100 percent guarantee. So I have to leave a backdoor for me and my son.”


  Pang Qian reached out and tapped his nose. “Coward.”


  He was still smiling, when he suddenly thought of something. He said, “I also have something to discuss with you.”


  “What is it?”


  Gu Mingxi slowly told Pang Qian that he’d also settled on his job plans. Teacher Dai helped arrange for some school interviews. She’d made certain that they didn’t mind his physical condition and would allow him to student-teach. There were two schools.

  “One is Sunny Middle School. I would be helping to teach art for the junior high students. If I end up staying, the work will be relatively leisurely and the salary isn’t bad. I’ll have abundant time to work on my own projects as well.”


  He paused. Seeing that Pang Qian didn’t respond, he continued. “The other is an elementary school. Wenzheng Elementary. Have you heard of it?”


  Pang Qian thought for a moment. Surprised, she said, “It’s a school for the children of migrant workers.”


  “That’s right,” Gu Mingxi nodded. “All the students there are kids of migrant workers. The principal there looked over my work history and saw that I’d previously taught in Sanya. They hoped that I could go to their school and not only teach art, but also English or math as well.”


  Pang Qian looked at him with wide eyes. Since she still hadn’t responded, he asked, “Where do you think I should go to work?”


  Seeing how careful his expression was, Pang Qian suddenly smiled. “Gu Mingxi, why are you playing dumb! You already decided which one you want to work at, didn’t you?”


  Gu Mingxi couldn’t help smiling. “Mm, I already gave them a response.”


  “You definitely picked Wenzheng.”


  “Mm,” he nodded. With a somewhat regretful tone, he said, “It’s just that the work there will be a lot busier than at Sunny Elementary.”


  Pang Qian hugged him and said, “No matter what choice you make, I’ll support you. I think that it’s more fitting that you go to an elementary school rather than a middle school.”


  Gu Mingxi asked, “Why?”


  Pang Qian replied righteously, “Junior high’s full of 15 and 16 year old girls who have just started learning about love. Seeing a handsome teacher like you, how dreadful would that be! I know how risky that is. But elementary schools are full of little girls, so I won’t have to worry.”


  Gu Mingxi was nearly in tears from laughing. “Says who? Haven’t you seen Haichuan when he sees Wang Song’s daughter? He immediately turns into a servant. He told me before that he really liked her and would marry her when he grew up.”


  Pang Qian stared in disbelief. “My goodness! He’s only 2 years old!”


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  After National Day, Gu Mingxi, Pang Qian, and their son returned to E City from Shanghai, ready to start their ‘graduation fieldwork.’ Pang Qian entered Jialai, still working under Zou Liwen. Gu Mingxi started teaching at Wenzheng Elementary, just an art teacher for now.

  On the first day of class, Pang Qian helped him put on a long-sleeved navy shirt and a beige knit sweater. She carefully helped him button it up and then tidied up the hem and sleeves. Gu Mingxi looked at his reflection in the mirror and asked, “How do I look?”


  Pang Qian raised her thumb. “Handsome!”


  The first class that Gu Mingxi taught was Grade 4’s Class 2. The head teacher brought him to the classroom and all the students stared, dumbfounded.

  After the head teacher left, Gu Mingxi turned to face the blackboard. He slipped off his right slipper and raised his foot to the board. He easily picked up a piece of white chalk and wrote down three characters: Gu Mingxi.

  He put down the chalk and turned back to face the class. Standing up straight, he smiled at the classroom of kids. “My name is Gu Mingxi. I’m 31 years old this year, and starting today, I’ll be your art teacher.”


  Seeing how astonished the students still were, Gu Mingxi smiled even more brightly. “I’m sure you all find it kind of strange. You must be thinking that this Teacher Gu doesn’t even have arms, so how could he draw. But I really can draw, and I use my feet to do it, in just the same way that I wrote my name on the board. Oh, student.”


  He looked at one of the male students and smiled. “You think I’m just talking big, don’t you? How about this. Why don’t you guys give me one class period to prove myself?”


  A few of the students nodded slightly. Gradually, more students started nodding. One student even had the guts to shout out, “Okay then!”


  Gu Mingxi stood at the lectern and bent over, flipping the page of his book with his mouth. “Then, let’s start class.”


  When the class ended, a group of kids circled around him, scrambling to ask questions.

  “Teacher Gu, how do you eat?”


  Gu Mingxi answered seriously. “I use my feet. My feet are really amazing, and they can do a lot of things.”


  “Can you put on your clothes too?”


  “Yep.”


  “Teacher Gu, why don’t you have any arms?”


  “When I was little, I was a naughty kid. I climbed onto a pole and got shocked with electricity and lost my arms.”


  “How old were you?”


  “6 years old.”


  The students started a commotion. One girl suddenly asked shyly, “Teacher Gu, do you have a girlfriend?”


  Gu Mingxi smiled. “I’m already married and I have a 2 year-old son.”


  “Wow…” A few girls started laughing and pushing each other. Gu Mingxi asked, “What are you laughing about?”


  The girls stood around the first girl who’d asked the question and all started talking at once. “Lu Xiaofang was just saying how she thought Teacher Gu was so handsome!”


  “When did I say that?!” Lu Xiaofang’s face turned red. One of the boys pursed his lips and then pulled on Lu Xiaofang’s sleeve. He said, “Hey, I’m going to buy snacks. Do you want to come?”


  Lu Xiaofang found a way out and walked off with the boy. The group of girls chased after them, full of laughs and then split up into their own groups of twos and threes.

  The class representative helped Gu Mingxi carry his tools back to the teacher’s office. As they walked down the corridor, Gu Mingxi turned and saw Lu Xiaofang and the boy carrying their purchases back.

  The boy’s hands were empty. As they walked, he kicked along a pebble on the ground. Lu Xiaofang was carrying a bag of snacks, eating with pleasure.

  Gu Mingxi looked at her a bit and then turned to head to the teacher’s office.

  And like that, he worked as an ordinary art teacher at Wenzheng Elementary, with none of his colleagues or students aware that he was the famous Mister Ostrich. Working as the art teacher was pretty leisurely. After two months of teaching, Gu Mingxi started to teach English for Grade 2. He’d never taught students that young before, and he felt that it was really too interesting.

  He was naturally well-liked. No matter what class he taught, his students all really liked him. At the end of the term, Teacher Gu, who only taught art class once a week, beat out the language, math, English, and other teachers as the favorite instructor for the six classes of Grade 4 and 5 students.

  Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian both grew busy with work, so Gu Haichuan was taken care of by his (maternal) grandparents. Pang Qian tried not to work overtime. Then she would pick up Gu Mingxi from Wenzheng Elementary. They would have dinner at her parents’ house before taking Baby Gu home.

  One day, after dinner, Pang Qian was washing dishes in the kitchen. Gu Mingxi and Jin Aihua were playing with Baby Gu in the living room.

  Pang Shuisheng slipped into the kitchen and asked Pang Qian quietly, “Old Gu gave me a call today.”


  Pang Qian suddenly became alert. She asked, “Mm? What did he say?”


  “He asked if Haichuan was well, if you you and Mingxi were well, if you’d settled your jobs. If Mingxi was having a hard time finding work, he could help to arrange something. He still has two years before he retires.” Pang Shuisheng closed the door to the kitchen and lit a cigarette. “He wants to see Haichuan. He said the last time he saw him was when you came back over summer, so it’s been several months.”


  Pang Qian lowered her head without a word.

  Pang Shuisheng sighed. “Qian Qian, now that you and Mingxi are back for work, find some time to take him to his (paternal) grandpa.”


  Pang Qian thought for a moment and then said, “Okay, we’ll visit. But Dad, I hope that you won’t put any pressure on Gu Mingxi about this. The problems between him and his dad can’t be resolved by just a few words from us. I know that Uncle Gu is older now and he wants to see his grandchild and he’s concerned about Gu Mingxi and Haichuan. But where was he when Gu Mingxi needed a father the most?”


  Pang Qian turned to look at Pang Shuisheng. “I’m definitely not going to try to convince Gu Mingxi to repair his relationship with his father, because I know that he doesn’t hate Uncle Gu. It’s just that he’s unable to love him, respect him, or understand him. It’s not my business how sad Uncle Gu is now, or how poor Gu Ziyue’s grades are, or how poor her temper is. The only thing I care about is whether or not Gu Mingxi is happy. You don’t know how vexing it is every time we have dinner with Uncle Gu and his family. I don’t think Gu Mingxi can be happy in the midst of all that. Gu Mingxi’s relationship with them is beyond saving. Do we really have to force Gu Mingxi to be a ‘filial son’, to be such a ‘magnanimous’ person?”


  Pang Shuisheng pondered on Pang Qian’s words. He nodded and sighed. “I understand what you’re saying. How about this. In the future, if Old Gu wants to see his grandson, we can invite him over during the day. We can all have a meal together and he can play with Haichuan. The two of us can even reminisce on the old days. And then you won’t have to get bullied by their family.”


  Laughter suddenly sounded from the living room. Pang Qian and Pang Shuisheng walked out of the kitchen and saw Baby Gu running around the living room, his butt naked. Jin Aihua was chasing behind him with his pants.

  “Rotton kid, hurry up and put your pants on! You’ll get sick!” Jin Aihua yelled at Baby Gu.

  Baby Gu ran over to hide behind Gu Mingxi. Suddenly, he was caught in Gu Mingxi’s feet and propped onto the sofa.

  Gu Mingxi grabbed onto Baby Gu and tickled him with his toes causing Baby Gu to squirm on the sofa, laughing. Then he got tired and climbed over to rest on top of Gu Mingxi.

  “Daddy,” he whined. “I want to pee.”


  “Mm?” When Gu Mingxi realized what he meant, it was already too late. He felt something warm and wet on his leg and then cried out, “Gu Haichuan!”


  The bare butt Baby Gu seemed to be urinating quite happily. Then he used his hands and feet to get up. He shook his little birdie and then turned to Jin Aihua. “Grandma, I want to put my pants on.”


  Pang Qian and Pang Shiusheng nearly went mad from laughter.

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  One summer day the next year, Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian graduated.

  Gu Mingxi was formally hired by Wenzheng Elementary and became an official state-employed teacher.

  Fudan’s masters and postdoc graduation ceremony was held first. Pang Qian wore her master’s cap and gown and received her diploma from the dean. She stood together with her peers and looked down from the stage. She saw her parents, her husband, and her son.

  She looked over at them, and Baby Gu in Jin Aihua’s arms waved at her. “Mommy!”


  Pang Qian, who’d brought her son along to the graduation, had caught a bit of attention. But the real attention-grabbing event occurred two days later.

  Gu Mingxi’s graduation ceremony.

  A 32 year old married man with a 2 year old son. He had no arms, but he was already signed on to teach at an elementary school. Fresh graduate, Gu Mingxi, had already become a legend at school.

  On the evening before his graduation, Gu Mingxi returned to his dorm. He wanted to spend his final day as a student in the school.

  When the sky just started to brighten, he woke up. Fu Qinfeng hadn’t woken up yet so Gu Mingxi quietly got out of bed and went to wash up. He carefully shaved. When he combed his hair and brushed his teeth, he spent even more time than usual. When he was done, he smiled at himself in the mirror. Seeing the row of white teeth, he finally put away his rinse cup.

  Fu Qinfeng helped him put on his graduation gown. The large gown draped over his body, obscuring his missing arms. It really made Gu Mingxi look like a tall and handsome man. Fu Qingfeng helped him put on his graduation cap as well. After tidying up the tassel, he smiled and said, “Old Gu, congratulations on graduating.”


  Xu Shuanghua had hurried back in order to attend Gu Mingxi’s graduation ceremony. Because of him, even Pang Qian and Haichuan were allowed into the preparation hall.

  Before Gu Mingxi headed to the stage, Pang Qian helped him neaten his cap and gown. She looked around at the young men and women, who had obviously relaxed a great deal. Then she looked at the man in front of her. He wasn’t that young. His eyes weren’t so willful, and his expression not to stubborn. He smiled warmly, the corners of his eyes crinkling, marking the passage of time.

  Pang Qian told Baby Gu in her arms, “Haichuan, what do you have to say to Daddy?”


  Baby Gu cried out, “Daddy, congratulations on graduating!”


  Gu Mingxi didn’t have someone else accept his diploma for him. He held the diploma between his cheek and shoulder, smiling as he took a photo with the school president.

  After the ceremony ended, everyone flocked outside the hall. Gu Mingxi’s classmates quickly surrounded him, each one of them wanting a photo with him.

  Some girls hugged him and cried, “Old Gu! I’ll miss you!”


  The boys kept saying, one after another, “Old Gu, when we go to visit E City, you have to come out for a drink with us!”


  Gu Mingxi smiled. “No problem. When you guys come to E City, I’ll act as your tour guide. I’ll take you around and treat you to a meal! We’ll stay out ’til we’re drunk!”


  “We want to go to your place! To eat your specialty dishes!”


  “It’s a deal!”


  A lot of people attended Gu Mingxi’s graduation ceremony. Afterwards, they waited outside the auditorium. Pang Shuisheng, Jin Aihua, Shark, Xiao Le, Tian Tian, Xu Shuanghua… Everyone took a photo together. Then the class president called for all the students to get a photo together and everyone circled around Gu Mingxi again. Pang Qian carried Baby Gu and watched them, and she realized that he’d been smiling the entire time. He was smiling so much that he couldn’t close his lips.

  After posing for a serious group photo, they started to take silly pictures. Pang Qian carried Baby Gu and walked over to them. Baby Gu raised his head and looked at the cap on Gu Mingxi’s head. “Daddy, I want to wear your hat.”


  Pang Qian helped Gu Mingxi take off his hat and put it onto Baby Gu’s head. It was a bit big and dropped down to cover Baby Gu’s eyes. All the girls on the side couldn’t stop laughing.

  Baby Gu laughed along. “I’m also a college student.”


  Just then, someone said, “Let’s toss up our caps!”


  “Ugh, you’re so old fashioned!”


  “This is called tradition!”


  “Old Gu, come on then. Have your son help you throw it up!”


  Pang Qian held onto Baby Gu and let him stand on his dad’s shoulders. She told him to hold the cap in his hands. She looked over at Gu Mingxi and realized that he was looking at her as well. A pair of clear, dark eyes, full of happiness.

  Gu Mingxi asked his son, “Are you ready?”


  Baby Gu nodded his head.

  The person taking photos said, “One, two, three!”


  Countless caps flew into the air. With Pang Qian’s help, Gu Haichuan’s little hands went up and Gu Mingxi’s graduation cap flew up into the sea of caps.

  Above their heads was the June Shanghai sky. Clear, blue, with floating white clouds.

  A school of birds flew past, flapping their wings with their might, headed into the distance.

  This story hasn’t ended.

  Perhaps one day, you’ll turn around and see Mister Ostrich and Miss Crab.

  They exist right beside us, just as all the other people in this story.

  So please, do not cry for them. And please, live a good life.

  Each and every one of us should live our own romantic story.

  Side Story 1 HOW MUCH I ENVY YOU (1/4)

  Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

  Martin’s not my boyfriend.

  _______________________________________________________________

  After a simple discussion with several teachers in the small conference room, Daisy scurried over to me before I could return to my office. “Hey! Dr. Xiao, I finally found you! Gary’s crying a fit right now! Hurry and check up on him. We can’t handle it!”


  I immediately followed after her to the consultation room. I asked, “What’s wrong with Gary?”


  “He hasn’t gotten used to it.” Daisy gestured at her right arm. “He keeps feeling that it hurts.”


  I nodded and entered the room. The 7 year old Gary was currently crying in his mother’s arms, and my two female colleagues were standing at the side, helpless in the face of this crisis.

  After Gary saw me, he seemed to grow more aggrieved. He cried out loudly, his face a puddle of tears.

  “Leave it to me,” I told Daisy. I walked over to his side and sat down. With a smile, I said, “Who’s this crying so much? Could it be our little Superman, Gary?”


  Gary was a pretty little boy with brown, curly hair and big green eyes. He looked at me, blinking, with beads of tears on his long eyelashes. Sniffling, he said, “Jodie, you lied to me! This arm isn’t good to use at all! It hurts so much!”


  A year ago, Gary lost his right arm in a car accident. When his parents brought him in to get fitted for a prosthetic, he was extremely dejected. But for some reason, the little kid and I got along quite well. When the staff was measuring the size of his stump, he was very uncooperative. I went over to see what was happening after he started crying. After getting caught up on the situation, I tried to talk to Gary a bit. Only then was he willing to take off his clothes so we could get a mold for his stump.

  “You can call me Jodie,” I told Gary at that time. “Lovely Gary, only the bravest kids get the chance to put on this super cool arm. I don’t agree to help everyone who comes asking for one. For example, people who love to cry. Oh… I really don’t like them.”


  Gary was crying like a kitten. “Jodie, will I really be able to have a new arm?”


  “Of course,” I told him with a smile.

  After arriving in America, I studied biomedical engineering. After my PhD, my specialty was focused on intelligent prosthetics. Although most patients who come in, like Little Gary, will choose myoelectric prosthetics that respond to EMG activity (Note: electrical activity from skeletal muscles), I and my advisor and research associates are striving to tackle intelligent prosthetics that respond to human brain and nerve signals.

  On Gary’s right shoulder, there remained a 10cm length stump. He was young and hadn’t adapted to the use of prosthetics. It was probably an emotional rejection. He periodically came to our institute for rehabilitation and training. He learned to use the prosthetic to drink water, to turn pages of a book, to eat, to pick up and place objects… I knew that this type of prosthetic wouldn’t allow him to perform very precise movements. For example, he wouldn’t be able to fold a (paper) lucky star, and he would be unable to use this fake arm to write. But I still patiently advised him.

  “Can you pick up the cup for me, Gary?”


  I encouraged him and watched him. Gary really tried to lift the cup of water for me. He was still in the adaptation phase for the prosthetic, so its appearance didn’t look like that of human skin. It looked like a metal skeleton, with lots of wires, connected to metallic fingers.

  With ours and Gary’s efforts, this object that was completely lacking in vitality became a very magical part of his body. It wasn’t alive, and it wasn’t filled with things that were in human bodies, but it could move.

  The arm could move. The elbow could move. The wrist could move. Even the fingers could move.

  Gary’s arm trembled as he picked up the cup of water and handed it to me. I immediately accepted it and applauded him.

  “You’re so awesome, Gary! You’ve made a lot of progress!” I gave him a hug and he raised his left arm to return the hug, his right arm moving slightly.

  “Hey, don’t be shy,” I told him.

  Gary’s face reddened and his brows furrowed as he exerted effort. He finally raised his right arm and completed his hug.

  “You simply couldn’t be better!” I gently pat his head. “Gary, I know that in the beginning it’s a little hard, but trust me, it’ll get better with time. Maybe one day, you’ll play basketball like Kobe Bryant. He’s your role model, isn’t he?”


  Gary nodded his head sheepishly. Then he said, “But Jodie, don’t you think this arm looks really ugly?”


  I feigned surprise. “How could I? I think it’s really cool!”


  “Next time I come, will you visit me again?”


  “Sure, but you also have to listen to Daisy.” I pulled Daisy over and told Gary, “She’s a super amazing doctor, and she’ll teach you how to use your new arm. I’m definitely not as good as her with that.”


  Gary finally agreed to let Daisy and the other staff members help him practice using his prosthetic arm. After I said goodbye with him, I heard some angry shouts from the rehabilitation hall.

  At a place like this, people often lost control of their emotions. A healthy person suddenly losing one of their limbs because of an illness or an accident would naturally find it hard to accept at first. All of our staff understand that, but this man’s shouts were a bit excessive.

  I couldn’t help walking over. I spotted him immediately among more than twenty rehab patients and the physiotherapist. He was a tall, young man, wearing a prosthetic left leg. He was leaning against the parallel bars as he shouted at the therapist.

  I walked over to him and realized that although his hair and eyes were dark brown, his features were obviously East Asian.

  He was still shouting when I attempted to calm him down. “Sir, please relax.”


  He turned to look at me, his eyes showing surprise. Then he shouted again, “Who are you?! Mind your own business!”


  I wore a light blue uniform and said, “My name is Xiao and I work here. I know that you’re going through a lot of difficulties, but sir, you’re a grown adult. There are many children here and they’ve gone through disastrous things as well, but aren’t they working hard to do well? Not only aren’t you setting a good example, you’re even scaring them.”


  What I said wasn’t false. In the rehab hall, there were many kids wearing prosthetic legs, practicing to walk. A lot of the kids looked over at the man, a frightened expression on their faces.

  His expression turned awkward and he clenched his jaw. After he stared at me awhile, he asked me in English, “Are you Chinese? Or Japanese, Korean?”


  “Chinese,” I responded.

  And then in standard Beijing dialect, he said, “If you were standing in my shoes, you wouldn’t say that.”


  I decided to ignore him.

  After I returned to my office, I made a cup of coffee. Wendy knocked on my door and said a package arrived for me from China.

  Somewhat coincidentally, I walked over to the counter and opened the package. It was a book and a card.

  “My Miss Crab,” I read the book name out loud. Then I saw the author, Mister Ostrich. A ‘boom’ went off in my mind as I started to feel a bit unsure about who and where I was.

  I opened the card. It was Xie Yi’s handwriting.

  Dear Jodie,

  Merry Christmas!

  Do you like the gift? We found him.

  –Martin

  Christmas 2010

  I carried the book back to my office. As I passed by the rehab hall, the angry man from earlier was walking out. During the rehab session, he had been wearing gym shorts and his left leg was amputated. His thigh was connected to a stump-receiving chamber with a pylon underneath, like a leg bone. After the session finished, he changed into a black coat and jeans. If not for the crutch he was using, I probably wouldn’t have realized that he was missing a leg.

  He’d already calmed down a great deal by then. He glanced over at me with a long face. I smiled and then walked back into my office.

  When I was getting off work, Wendy and Daisy both called after me, “Dr. Xiao, it’s Christmas soon. Ada said we’d have dinner together tonight. You should come too!”


  I put on my coat and shook my head. “Thanks, but I have an appointment tonight.”


  Daisy giggled and said, “Are you going to video chat with your handsome boyfriend in Beijing?”


  I couldn’t help laughing. “Martin’s not my boyfriend.”


  “Please, he’s already come here several times to see you.”


  “Regretfully, there’s just no chemistry between him and I.” I grabbed my bag and put on my scarf, and then walked out with them. After locking the door, I said, “Moreover, he already has a girlfriend.”


  December in New York was as cold as in E City, if not colder.

  I walked across the icy parking lot and drove my car home. The first thing I did when I got inside was pick up my cat.

  I picked up (adopted?) this cat. It was yellow and white without an obvious breed. I named it Ah Miao, and since I gave it a Chinese name, I spoke to it in Chinese. This American Ah Miao answered really well, seemingly having grasped onto the language well.

  I lived by myself at a building near the school. I’d bought the house because I planned to live there for a long time. The subject I was studying would need a lot of time, so I wouldn’t be able to roam around like my parents had. My dad was a zoologist and my mom was a veterinarian. The place they moved to was poor and remote, and they often ran into dangers. I used to want to live that kind of life, but the present me wanted to stay in one of the most developed countries in the world to further the studies of smart prosthetics.

  I made myself a bowl of noodles and vegetable soup for dinner. Afterwards, I filled the tub with water and took a bath. Then I changed into my pajamas and crawled under the covers.

  I read ‘My Miss Crab,’ and when I finished, I sat on my bed and sent Xie Yi an email on my laptop.

  I told him I received the gift and thanked him.

  His name immediately popped up on Skype and I answered his call.

  “I just got to the office,” Xie Yi said clearly. “What are you doing?”


  “I just got into bed,” I said. “Oh yeah, where’s he been all these years?”


  He knew who I was talking about and quickly responded, “Sanya, in Hainan.”


  “Oh…” It clicked for me. That was a place with a warm climate, and he hated cold winters.

  “Crab’s going to see him in a few days,” Xie Yi said. “We’re planning on giving him a Christmas surprise.”


  He’ll definitely be happy, I thought.

  “Not bad.” I asked, “How have you been lately?”


  “The same. You?”


  “Also the same. Busy with work.”


  “Will you come home next year for New Year’s?”


  I thought for a moment. “Why do you ask?”


  “Crab’s planning on bringing Gu Mingxi home then. If you came back too, we could have a big party.”


  “I’m not sure,” I said. “We’ll talk about it when the time gets closer.”


  Xie Yi suddenly said, “Jodie, you don’t have any questions you want to ask me?”


  I rolled my eyes. “How are you and your girlfriend?”


  “We broke up,” he responded very quickly.

  I was left speechless.

  Countless people had asked me before, ‘Jodie, why don’t you accept Martin?’ Or they’d say, ‘Xiao Yujing, why don’t you accept Xie Yi?’


  The reason they ask that is because Xie Yi was really too perfect.

  So perfect that you couldn’t find any flaws.

  Once, I asked him, ‘Xie Yi, if you could use one animal to describe yourself, what would you choose?’


  He said, ‘An eagle.’


  In the story of ‘My Miss Crab,’ there were two supporting characters. Miss Antelope, who was myself, and the other was Mister Peacock.

  I don’t know if that was Gu Mingxi teasing Xie Yi or not, but I felt that, regardless of whether it was an eagle or a peacock, they couldn’t be likened to Xie Yi.

  He was a very, very good person. With an eye-catching appearance and a superior family background, but he didn’t carry the usual arrogant demeanor of rich kids. He studied hard and worked hard. If I had to name a flaw of his, it would probably be that other people see him as a bit whimsical, doing as he pleases.

  Xie Yi never forced himself to do anything he didn’t want to. In that respect, he and I are very alike.

  But where we differ is that he would always put his life on the line to do the things he wanted to do, whereas I would come to a decision to act or retreat after careful consideration.

  That was the reason I rejected him.

  He’s great, but I don’t love him.

  Ah Miao jumped onto my bed and purred at my laptop. I sneezed and said, “Xie Yi, I’m going to sleep.”


  I laid on the bed and Ah Miao settled down beside me. I was very tolerant with him, so if he wanted to sleep together on the bed, I didn’t shoo him away. (Note: The author doesn’t specify whether the cat is male or female. I simply adopted ‘he’ because using ‘it’ sounded strange in English.)

  I pet Ah Miao, who appeared very comfortable, meowing lazily. Lying in the dark room, I couldn’t go to sleep. For some reason, I suddenly thought about that summer day so many years ago.

  The first time I saw Gu Mingxi was the first day of school. There was a strange desk in the last row of the classroom. One side was a normal height, but the other half was shorter.

  The rest of the class and I were all very curious, unsure of the purpose of that desk. Until Gu Mingxi came into the room.

  That boy had a pair of doe eyes, pure and clear, calm. He didn’t seem to fear the class’ eyes on him. He just walked toward that particular desk and sat down.

  There was already a girl sitting on the other side. Her hair was tied up in a ponytail and she had a smiling face. The boy walked over and wriggled his shoulders, and then his backpack fell onto his desk. Then he sat down and took of his shoes, resting his feet on his desk.

  He lowered hie head, and naturally tidied up his backpack with his feet. His two shirt sleeves swung around by his sides. He would occasionally say a few things to the girl beside him. I watched for awhile before turning back to the front.

  During the military training, I remembered his name.

  Gu Mingxi.

  Mister Ostrich.

  Side Story 1 HOW MUCH I ENVY YOU (4/4)

  Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

  Jodie, your new haircut’s not bad. Short hair makes you look cuter.

  _______________________________________________________________

  After Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian parted ways with us, I sent Xie Yi home. After he got out of the taxi, he didn’t stagger anymore and his eyes had cleared. He just grabbed my hand tightly and walked down the deserted road to his house.

  I didn’t struggle. The street lights cast two shadows behind us. As we walked, Xie Yi suddenly said, “Jodie, do you know how much I envy you?”


  I looked at him beside me, but I didn’t answer.

  He suddenly laughed at himself and then turned to me, pulling me into his arms.

  “How exactly was your heart formed?” Xie Yi held me tighter. His hoarse voice floated into my ear. “Where is it exactly that I fall short compared to him?”


  “I’ve never thought of you in comparison to anyone else,” I said. “Xie Yi, you should know. You’re the one that everyone envies.”


  “Really?” He released me, and then looked at me with red eyes. “Then, do you envy me?”


  “No.” I honestly shook my head.

  He couldn’t help laughing. “You can’t even bother to lie to me.”


  “No, I don’t envy anyone,” I said, looking him straight in the eyes.

  He suddenly moved closer to me, forcing me to step back. He spoke slowly and clearly, “Do you dare to say that you don’t envy her, even a little?”


  Faced with this question, I could only remain silent.

  I wondered how I could leave, when suddenly my phone rang. I picked it up. It was Lin Weiqi.

  “Jodie, I have some good news and some bad news. Which one do you want to hear first?” His voice sounded tired, heavy. My heart tightened, and I said, “Bad news.”


  “I have a fever,” he said. “Good news is that Ah Miao’s fine.”


  I let out a sigh of relief. “Ah… Thank you.”


  His voice was gentle when he responded, “You’re welcome. I’m a veterinarian, so this is my job. But… Why didn’t you say anything about my own condition?”


  I suddenly laughed. “Did you go to see a doctor?”


  “No, but I took some medicine.”


  Firecrackers sounded in the distance. It was the last day of the Spring Festival holiday, so a lot of people were set off all the fireworks they still had. Lin Weiqi must have heard the sound, because he said, “Sounds lively. I miss the New Year’s in China. That’s how you celebrate a new year.”


  I asked curiously, “You’ve spent New Year’s in China before?”


  “My mom’s Vietnamese-Chinese and my dad’s Chinese-American mixed. My grandpa’s from Beijing, so I lived there for a long time.”


  I laughed. “No wonder your Chinese is so good.”


  When I saw Xie Yi’s cold expression, I immediately stopped the conversation. “Sorry, Virgil, I have to hang up. I’ll call you when I get back to New York. Thanks for taking care of my cat.”


  After I hung up, I turned to Xie Yi. “I want to go home.”


  He said, “I’ll send you.”


  I was speechless. “I had to send you back because you drank too much. How can you send me back now?”


  He was angered by me again. He suddenly asked, “Who were you on the phone with?”


  I looked at him. “Xie Yi.”


  A moment later, his hands curled into fists. “Let me apologize to you. I’m sorry. I feel a bit light-headed.”


  He hugged me again, pressing my face to his chest. “I’m a bit light-headed, really. (Note: or perhaps ‘I’m out of my mind’ is more fitting) Jodie, I’m beyond saving.”


  After the holiday concluded, I returned to New York and went to pick up Ah Miao from Lin Weiqi.

  He would occasionally give me a call and ask something about prosthetics. After we got to know each other a bit more, I found that he was a rather interesting person. He was very serious, and his face often gave a fierce impression. But when he smiled, he was very cute.

  Lin Weiqi ran a pet shop and a small animal hospital. Because of my parents, I’ve always liked pets, so sometimes I would drop into his store to look at the puppies.

  I would help him bathe the dogs. He taught me how to feed the little kittens with a syringe. I watched as Lin Weiqi treated the dogs. He was very patient and gentle. He would speak to the dogs as he helped to clean up their wounds.

  I sat at his side and watched. I watched as he walked, his left leg a bit stiff. I watched the serious and quiet expression on his face. I licked my milk candy lollipop, a snack he bought for me and left in the shop. He said, “Girls love sweets.”


  I could very clearly feel the slight change between Lin Weiqi and myself. But before anything could happen, I was sent to Germany to study for a year.

  A year later, in the summer of 2012, I returned to New York and received Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian’s letter. They told me a lot of good news. Pang Qian got into her graduate program, Gu Mingxi got into college, and they were getting married.

  I sat in front of laptop for a long time, before I finally sent a reply to Gu Mingxi.

  I told him the story of Arno and his family’s drum. And then I said, “Mister Ostrich, Happy Marriage.”


  Then I went to the hair salon and cut the hair that I’d been growing out for years, returning to my refreshing, short hair.

  Every day, I went for a morning run. I took the same path and I went at the same time each day. One morning, as I was running, I turned a corner and then someone started running beside me.

  I turned to look at him, surprised. “Virgil?”


  I hadn’t seen Lin Weiqi in a year, but he was looking good now. His dark brown hair bounced as he ran and his eyes glowed. He was wearing shorts, and I could see his slender and strong right leg, as well as the left leg prosthetic wearing a pair of running shoes.

  He was running really well, keeping pace with me. He smiled at me. “Jodie, your new haircut’s not bad. Short hair makes you look cuter.”


  “Thanks,” I said. “Hey, let’s have a race.”


  He raised his brow. “Sure.”


  After a bit, he fell behind. I heard him shout, “Jodie, hey! Xiao Yujing! Wait for me!”


  I finally stopped, and put my hands on my waist, gasping for breath. Lin Weiqi slowly and leisurely came over. His posture and pace wasn’t as good as when he started.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked him.

  He was covered in sweat as he reached out a hand. “I can’t keep going. You’ll have to drag me.”


  He was also out of breath. I grabbed his hand and he shook his head. “The Chinese are especially attentive to the old, sick, disabled, and pregnant. But you… You’re really too bad.”


  I glared at him. “Where did you see that?”


  “When I… When I was in Beijing… Sitting… Sitting on the subway. And on the bus too, they wrote it everywhere.” He clasped tightly to my hand and walked forward with me. “Goodness, after we run this far, how are we going to make it back? I’m afraid I won’t be able to walk anymore.”


  I laughed. “I’ll piggyback you back!”


  He turned to look at me, and the sun behind created a halo of gold around him. In the sun, his brown eyes looked the color of amber.

  I suddenly felt that the joke was over and I wanted to let go of his hand, but he didn’t let go. Instead, he held on tighter.

  “Jodie, I’m tired. Let’s find somewhere to have breakfast, okay?”


  I could feel the sweat on his palm. Wet, sticky, and hot. I also heard the heart inside of my chest beating very fast.

  On an ordinary morning, on an ordinary street corner, I held hands with a man, both of us soaked in sweat, looking at each other.

  I raised my head up to the sky. The weather was really nice.

  I smiled toward him and said, “Okay.”


  Side Story 1 HOW MUCH I ENVY YOU (3/4)

  Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

  If you had a boyfriend, how could he handle your weird temperament?

  _______________________________________________________________

  I arrived back in China before the start of the Spring Festival. The break was two weeks long. I decided to fly to Beijing to visit my college professors first and get together with my old college classmates. Then I would return to E City.

  When Xie Yi found out I’d be in Beijing, he called me out to meet with him. I told him that my schedule in Beijing was pretty packed, and that we could talk when I got back to E City. Xie Yi didn’t try to force me past that.

  I first became entangled with Xie Yi in Year 2, with the Spring Festival arts performance. Before then, I hadn’t even known who he was.

  At that point, he’d already been designated the most handsome boy at First High, and he was the object of countless crushes. But I really had no clue who he was.

  We met for the first time in the teacher’s office. When the teacher asked the two of us to perform a violin duet together, I immediately said, “There’s no need to cause such trouble. I can withdraw from the performance and let this student perform his solo. I’m not used to performing together with someone else.”


  I swear, my words were completely genuine. What I said was what I meant, and there was no hidden meaning behind it. But oddly enough, both the teacher and Xie Yi thought that I was a bit unhappy about it. I figured that they must have misunderstood my last sentence.

  And indeed, Xie Yi said, “Look here, (this) student, I’m also not used to performing with someone else. But more than that, I don’t want to strip you of your right to perform. If you don’t want to do a duet, then I’ll withdraw.”


  I didn’t want to get any more involved in these questions, so I said, “Forget it. Let’s do a duet then. As long as you’re willing to practice, I don’t mind.”


  From then on, Xie Yi and I would practice together after school ended. But on the first day of practice, we fought.

  My violin playing wasn’t that good. If I were to go and take an exam at a professional institute, I’d definitely lose tons of points. But I just enjoyed playing the violin, with my own style, to express my heart. I didn’t care about the fingering, the stance, or even the tempo. If I wanted to play faster, I would. If I wanted to play slower, I would. Who decided that there was only one way to play a song? So when Xie Yi pointed out all the parts where my tempo was wrong, I told him, “I think we’re wasting time here, really. I don’t want to perform. You can just perform your solo.”


  Later on, Xie Yi told me what he thought at the time. When he first heard me say that we were ‘wasting time,’ he simply didn’t dare to believe his ears.

  Xie Yi really was like an eagle, enjoying being able to fly freely through the sky. But at the same time, he was also like a peacock. A lot of people liked him, and he was very popular. No matter where he went, he was the focus of everyone’s attentions. I guessed that there were countless girls who’d have loved to be able to perform a violin duet with him, but I said that we were just wasting time.

  Xie Yi didn’t agree to my dropping out of the performance. Instead, it seemed as if his fighting spirit was ignited by me. He transformed into a violin teacher, wanting to teach me from the basics, hoping that through his training, we’d be able to perform a stunning duet on stage for the audience. But in the end, we just ended up fighting each time.

  Eventually, I ended up following along with his ideas. I still felt that we were wasting our time, but Xie Yi didn’t seem to think so.

  That performance was said to be a huge success. Many years later, when I was talking to Teacher Dai on the phone, she would start talking to me about the performance and how every year, the teachers still remembered it.

  My memory of that day’s events aren’t very clear. What I remembered most was the expression on Gu Mingxi’s face when I got backstage.

  He wasn’t as excited as the rest of the crowd. Others were applauding, but he just stood quietly at my violin case, waiting. There was just a hint of amazement and commendation in his eyes.

  It was that tiny gleam in his eyes that reminded me of Arno.

  After I changed my clothes and picked up my case, I asked him, “Gu Mingxi, what did you think of my performance?”


  “It was good,” he said. Then he stressed, “It was really good. I’m not just saying it.”


  I secretly smiled. I saw Pang Qian looking over from afar, and then I asked him, “I’m going out to the auditorium. What about you?”


  His face reddened and he replied quietly, “I’m going to stay a little longer.”


  I nodded. “Okay. Thanks for watching my things. I’m going first.”


  After that performance, I thought that Xie Yi wouldn’t ever want to talk to me again. I hadn’t at all expected that it was just the start.

  It was the first time in my life that a boy had so persistently and fervently pursued me with such youthful spirit.

  From the very start, I clearly told Xie Yi that I didn’t like him. But he seemed unable to accept my answer, or maybe, he just didn’t believe me.

  In June of Year 2, the Korea-Japan-hosted World Cup was getting into full force. One afternoon, Xie Yi called me out of class and confessed to me again.

  “I’m sorry.” With just those two words, I turned to head back into the classroom. Xie Yi grabbed my hand and pulled me out to the balcony.

  He blusteringly asked me, “Xiao Yujing, do you like Gu Mingxi?”


  I bit my lip and looked at him silently.

  He said, “I knew you liked Gu Mingxi! When I invited you over to my house to watch the ball game, you were so adamant against going. Then when I said that Gu Mingxi would be coming, you suddenly agreed! Xiao Yujing, you sit next to Gu Mingxi all day long. Don’t you know that he likes Crab?! The whole world knows that he likes Crab! But you don’t know?! Wake up, won’t you?! He won’t like you!”


  I stared at him coldly. “Xie Yi, do you know you’re really stupid?” (Note: ‘Stupid’ or wuliao is one of the hardest words for me to translate sometimes. It’s such a common word, but doesn’t have a ‘standard’ translation. It can mean boring, senseless, or annoying… but also, sort of all of it)

  He glared at me with resentment, his pretty eyes full of anger.

  When I turned to leave, he grabbed onto me and pulled me into his arms.

  Then he kissed me.

  I spent the Christmas of 2004 in Beijing. Xie Yi called me and said he and Pang Qian had gone to Z City to find Gu Mingxi.

  “You didn’t find him, did you?” I asked.

  He responded, “Mm,” and then told me what he’d heard about from Pang Qian.

  Gu Mingxi quit school.

  I’d never thought of that happening before.

  “Gu Mingxi liked Crab for so many years, and only after he disappeared did she realize her own feelings.” Xie Yi’s mood seemed a bit down. “Jodie, if one day, I were to go missing, would you suddenly wake up and realize, ‘Oh, so I liked Xie Yi.'”


  I really didn’t want to hurt him, but I had to tell the truth. “I wouldn’t.”


  Xie Yi was quiet for a moment. Then he gave a laugh, as quiet as possible. “I knew it.”


  Two months later, he sent me a message with an attached photo. It was him and an Asian girl having fun at Disneyland. Xie Yi said that the she was his girlfriend.

  But his love life didn’t go so smoothly. After just half a year, Xie Yi and his girlfriend broke up.

  After that, he got another girlfriend. I was already in America by then. He flew from the west coast to the east coast to see me, which caused everyone around me to misunderstand that he was my boyfriend.

  I was stone-hearted enough that I never made any comments about Xie Yi’s personal life.

  I was in no position to. I was just an old friend.

  All these years, I’ve been following the plan I set. I got into the top university in the nation. I picked a major that I liked. I chose an outstanding school to study abroad at. I didn’t stray even a single step off the path. And I decided that I wouldn’t date while I was in school.

  It was already four years since I’d been back to China. My parents had come to live in New York for awhile as well. That Spring Festival, I met many relatives and friends I hadn’t seen in a long time. They all said that I’d changed greatly. But actually, all I did was grow my hair out, learn to wear makeup, and pick out clothes.

  I thought that they were all mistaken, thinking that the past me was very individual and solitary, unlike other girls my age. In truth, I wasn’t at all different from everyone else. I was already 27 years old. If I hadn’t learned to dress up, I’d probably have become the school weirdo.

  Wu Min called me and said that our high school classmates were having a get together. Coincidentally, my family was also having a dinner, so I declined.

  In high school, Wu Min and I didn’t interact much. It wasn’t until we both studied at Peking University that we became close. He was a very pure and simple person. When I left for America, we would still often chat online, already having become quite good friends.

  Wu Min said that Gu Mingxi was also coming to the get together. No one had seen him in nearly eight years, and (Wu Min?) hoped that I could make it.

  I thought about it, and then said okay and told him to send me the time and address.

  After I hung up, I sat at the table for a long time, my mind wandering. So it had already been eight years.

  The Gu Mingxi in my memories was still an 18 year old youth. We sat together at the desk near the window. The warm sun streamed in and made me sleepy, so I would lay down on my arms for a bit. I looked over my arm at him. The sun shined onto his shoulder, making the dust floating in the air visible. His thick, black hair glowed healthily in the light. I could see his slender neck, the white collar from his shirt, the tiny and fine hairs on his skin, and the beads of sweat rolling down the side of his face.

  During the lunch break, the weather was really hot. The ceiling fan would turn, but the wind barely reached our back corner. Still, I felt so at ease.

  Gu Mingxi never took an afternoon nap. Maybe it had to do with his physical condition. When everyone else was resting, he would still be working on practice problems.

  I looked at his side profile, at the subtle expression on his face. His slightly pinched, dark brows. The gentle blinking of his eyes. His straight nose. And his thin lips.

  Sometimes, sweat would slide down his cheek. When he felt it, he would rub his cheek against his shoulder and shake his sleeve.

  He would unobtrusively look over at me, perhaps because he didn’t want me to see his slightly awkward movements. So each time, I would close my eyes and pretend that I was asleep.

  It was such a scene that was engraved into my mind. Every summer, I would remember that wet afternoon, clothes soaked in sweat and skin sticky from the heat.

  I had once secretly watched a boy like this too, when I was 18 years old.

  My phone suddenly rang. I answered it, and it was Lin Weiqi.

  “Jodie, did I disturb you?” he asked.

  “No. Did you need something?”


  “Ah Miao’s sick.” Lin Weiqi’s voice was very apologetic. “It might be because the sudden change in environment scared him a bit. I also fed him a different brand of food, and he seems to have come down with acute gastroenteritis.”


  “Is it serious?” I asked. I’d been raising Ah Miao for nearly two years and he’d never gotten very sick before.

  “A bit of vomiting and diarrhea. I gave him some medicine, so it should be okay for now,” Lin Weiqi said. “I thought I should still call and let you know. I’m sorry for not taking better care of Ah Miao. But I’ll make sure he recovers well before you get back.”


  I thought for a moment, and then I said, “Virgil, it’s okay. I’m sure that you’ve been taking good care of Ah Miao. If, and I’m saying if, he gets really sick or dies, you don’t have to feel bad. I won’t blame you.”


  Lin Weiqi seemed a bit speechless. “Jodie, Ah Miao just has gastroenteritis.”


  “Since you called me, that means that the situation is very dire. Isn’t that so?” I asked. “Virgil, you have to do your best to treat him. If Ah Miao dies, tell him something for me: I love him. But you have to use Chinese, since he doesn’t understand English anymore.”


  Lin Wieqi started a moment. Then he said, “Jodie, do you have a boyfriend?”


  “Eh?”


  “If you had a boyfriend, how could he handle your weird temperament?”


  “Do you have a girlfriend then?”


  “No.”


  I said, “Thank goodness. If you did, how could she handle your anger issues?”


  Lin Weiqi, “…”


  I was a bit unhappy, because Lin Weiqi said that I had a weird temperament.

  I admit that I’m not the kind of person to get along with everyone. Even now, I wasn’t that close with any of my colleagues at work. When they went out for dinner or drinks, I rarely participated. Instead, I went home to my little place, hugged Ah Miao, and read.

  Of course I would polish off my edges a bit. I didn’t want to be looked upon as a freak. In truth, I’ve always thought that I was a very ordinary female, just a bit socially inept.

  A few days later, I attended the high school get together. I hadn’t expected there to so much traffic, and I ended up late.

  I pushed open the door to the private room, and everyone inside was very lively. When the people at the table saw me, they all calmed down.

  I smiled and said, “What’s wrong, you don’t recognize me?”


  They stood up. The young and innocent faces I remembered had changed a bit. I saw Gu Mingxi, and he was wearing a beige shirt with black pants, looking mature and handsome. He was no longer the youth in a white collared shirt that I remembered. Standing together with the fashionable Pang Qian, they looked perfect for each other.

  I also saw Xie Yi, still ever the image of a shining prince. At the dinner table, with all these other people around, we didn’t speak much. I just watched as he downed glass after glass of red wine.

  In the end, Xie Yi got drunk. I decided to send him home, and also to have a talk with him.

  Outside the restaurant, Xie Yi wrapped his arms around a tree and started vomiting. Pang Qian considerately held a bottle of water for him. I turned around and saw Gu Mingxi not far away.

  In the midst of the winter wind, he wore a grey coat, giving off a very calm air. When he caught me eye, he smiled slightly.

  Taking advantage of Pang Qian standing with Xie Yi, I walked over to Gu Mingxi. The cold wind blew. We were standing right in front of each other, but I didn’t know what to say.

  Finally, he was the one to break the silence. He asked, “Are you planning on returning to China after you finish your doctorate?”


  I shook my head. “Probably not. For the next ten years or so, I probably won’t come back (to stay).”


  He frowned and said, “I heard you and Wu Min talking earlier. Sorry, my English isn’t very good anymore. But I seem to have heard… that you two were talking about prosthetics?”


  Regarding this topic, I usually used English to speak to Wu Min about it. I lifted my head and looked him in the eyes, not avoiding his gaze. Calmly, I responded, “Yes, my advisor and I are currently researching the topic of smart prosthetics, upper limbs in particular. Modern lower limb prosthetics have already made great progress, and their compensation for real limbs is very good. However, upper limb prosthetics are still far away from being a replacement for an arm.”


  He smiled, not at all unhappy because of this sensitive topic. He said, “That’s how it is. Arms and legs have different purposes, so they’re hard to compare.”


  “We’re making great progress in our research.” I explained it to him simply, “In the next few years, we might have a breakthrough. After implanting a chip into the human brain, the user will be able to perceive and control their prosthetic limb. Coupled with the nerves that still remain in their amputated limb, they’ll be able to have fuller control of the prosthetic. In the best case scenario, people will be able to rely on these upper limbs to completely take care of themselves.”


  Gu Mingxi laughed. “Like a robot?”


  I thought for a moment and then nodded. “That’s right, like a robot.”


  Probably because he’d had some alcohol, a mischievous expression slipped onto his face. “When I was younger, I always wanted to have two mechanical arms. When I found out it couldn’t happen, I was depressed for a long time.”


  “Nothing’s impossible now.” Curious about it, I said, “Gu Mingxi, if… I’m saying if, you needed some help on this front, you can give me a call.” Hearing my voice, I still couldn’t believe I’d just said those words. I continued, “Your condition is very suitable for electronic prosthetics. At first, you might find it hard to adapt to, but after you practice, you’ll be able to do a lot with the help of the prosthetics.”


  He nodded. “I know. I looked into it before. Thank you, Xiao Yujing, but… I don’t plan on getting prosthetics.”


  I didn’t ask him why, because I already knew the answer.

  For Gu Mingxi, prosthetic arms may be a kind of burden. But I trust that the majority of physically disabled people will need our help. Especially young, poor, and disabled children. I firmly believe that our research can change their fates.

  I decided on this path in the winter of 2003. I was studying in Beijing when my dad called and said that Simba had died.

  That lion prince that should have been running through the African savannah ended up dying in a zoo.

  At the time, I thought of Gu Mingxi. Not that long before I found out about Simba, I was on the phone with him, through the number that Pang Qian had asked Wang Song to send out.

  Gu Mingxi sounded very down and out on the phone. I knew that he must have hit some difficulties.

  That was the time when I was thinking about studying abroad. Whatever field I continued with, there would be a large gap from other things. I wasn’t studying these things lightly. Whatever path I took, I was planning on continuing down that path professionally and to continue researching it.

  Because of Gu Mingxi and because of Simba, I set my path down in stone.

  I changed the topic. “Speaking of, Gu Mingxi, I read your book.”


  He was taken aback. “They sell it in America too?”


  “No, Xie Yi mailed me a copy,” I said. “The artwork was good, but… Miss Antelope seemed to be missing some scenes.”


  Seeing Gu Mingxi’s frozen expression, I knew that he didn’t get my joke.

  I could only change the topic again. “Did you guys keep that drum?”


  Gu Mingxi froze again, and then he nodded. “Yeah, it’s at Pang Qian’s house. She’s keeping it well.”


  I laughed and said, “That’s good. Don’t throw it away and don’t gift it to anyone else.”


  He squinted at me. “That drum… Is there a story behind it?”


  “When you and Pang Qian get married, I’ll tell you,” I said.